Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Alarm Clock

I was reading through my friends' Friendster pages. And stuff that I never knew they have were all flashed before my eyes by the hundreds of testimonials that I've read. I miss them even more. I wish I have more time in the world to spend extra hours just hanging out with them and do all the silly stuff that we used to.



How come as you get older in life, you live life less? More and more of your time are spent on being productive, when those times could have been spent in living life to the fullest. I find it really stupid and offensive that most of us are working 8 hours a day, 5 days a week to earn a living and yet don't have a life. We are all like mindless beings who are forced to go with the norms of the society to belong.



Then how do we make the most out of our lives? I have simple wants. The simplest things make me happy. Chatting the whole night with my closest friends and ten packs of cigarettes are enough. It doesn't even matter where. And still it's difficult to find time. I often find myself saying no to invitations from friends simply because I can't. Because I'm busy. But am I really? Are we really THAT busy?



I want to make myself more flexible and less caring with the things around me. I'm not sure if it's even possible with all the responsibilities. With all the bills to pay. I'm sure tens of thousands of you have the same concerns. All my life, I keep on worrying about so many things. I just want to get away from that thought and start living my life the way I want it to be. I just want to be numb.



I want to party all night, get drunk, smoke til my lungs expire, and dance to the rhythm of life. At the end of the day, I'll go home, sleep on my bed and wake up at noon. I want to give my alarm clock a rest. I want to be able to wake up getting a full eight-hour sleep without feeling guilty or worried that I might get late the following day. I want to read a book, play a new musical instrument, ride a bike, learn how to make a sushi, feel the grass under my feet, bunjee jump, see a goldfish pagoda, indulge in ice cream, and scream at the top of my lungs. It will be so nice to do all of that in one day.



But again, reality check, I have to make my ends meet. It's almost seven. I got to get my alarm clock ready.

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