I just lost my very bestfriend and the best two years of my life. It's really very sad but I guess things are better this way. Even when people are so much in love with each other there are other things that should be considered. A lesson I learned but I guess I learned much too late. I feel really down but happy in a way because I know that those memories we had together will never be forgotten and will always be a special part of me.

God knows how hard I tried to make it work. But lately things are becoming very different for both of us. There was no third party or anything like that and I'm sure the passion is still there. It just so happened that we're simply growing apart. If only I could make it work on my own, I'll most definitely do it. But the fact remains that relationships are meant to be driven by both partners.

Do I have regrets? Maybe, maybe not. I dont know. I seriously dont. What I can say is that all the times that we've had are very precious to me. I've never had a partner my whole life where I gave my everything, my totality, my entire being. If there's one thing that I probably regret is the part where u get hurt in the end. But I guess that can never be compromised. If you give yourself to somebody, you're also giving that person a chance or a possibility to inflict you pain. But the feeling of love is much too strong. Way too strong that you'd rather take the risk of getting hurt than let go of the intense feeling. When you're in love, it's hard to think. You just feel. And as soon as everything ends it'll make you think for sure. What have I done wrong? What have I left undone?

I guess there's no more point in analyzing things. People get tired and so do I. I'll just let the pain remain for now. I'm sure someday everything will pass. What if we see each other again? I'm not sure. It's hard to say. I guess by that time it wont be too hard to put on a smile.

It's over. I'll move on now...